The Bottom LineQuestion: You’ve said that asking the right question is harder than it looks.

Adubato: Asking questions is an art form. Some people are a lot better at it than others. The most effective professionals in sales, customer service or counseling are those who truly understand how to ask questions.

Question: How can we hone this skill?

Adubato: One of the most effective questioning techniques is called the “funnel” approach. Picture what a funnel looks like: wide at the top and narrow at the bottom. The idea is to ask broad, general questions at the beginning and continue to narrow the focus of your questions with greater specificity. Your goal is to draw out your audience, be it one or 100, in an effort to capture their true wants, hopes and needs.

Question: Are there specific questions that should be used?

Adubato: Your first questions open the door. You want to get the other person talking. Consider some general questions that achieve this goal: What do you like most about your work? What goals do you and your organization want to accomplish over the next six months? How do you see your personal and/or professional life changing over the next several years?

Then the key is to truly listen to what is said and make sure the next questions you ask tap into what you’ve heard. Start narrowing the funnel. So, for example, if someone responds to the question regarding what they like most about their work with, “I enjoy the challenges I face on a daily basis and the opportunity to take risks,” a logical follow-up question would be, “Could you tell me of a recent challenge you’ve faced?” or, “What’s the biggest risk you’ve taken recently and how did it work out?”

Question: This sounds like you’re letting the answers lead the discussion.

Adubato: Absolutely. The key is to get even more specific with the questions you are asking. Now you are getting to the bottom of the funnel. “What was the reaction of those around you to how you took on the challenge?” or “When you took on that risk, what was your greatest fear or concern?” Then finally, at the bottom of the funnel, you might say, “What’s the biggest lesson you’ve taken away from this?”

As you can see, the questions become more and more specific. And resist the urge to jump around to different topics; you can’t have several funnels going on at the same time.

Question: What are some common mistakes communicators make when asking questions?

Adubato: One of the biggest is to ask questions without a game plan, wandering all over the map. This can waste valuable time and turn people off.

Question: How can we apply this technique to other aspects of our lives?

Adubato: The possibilities are endless. For example, the funnel approach of questioning is extremely helpful in solving problems, identifying opportunities and resolving conflict. Consider this. If you are in a debate with someone, what do you accomplish by simply arguing the same point over and over again? Usually nothing. So, instead of making a point or arguing with someone, ask a question: “Jim, if we do what you propose, what impact do you think it will have on our customers?” The goal is to get out of argument mode and move to a more productive dialogue. A probing question is a great way of switching gears. Then, once Jim responds, you can proceed with the funnel approach by asking a more specific question.

Bottom line. Questions are powerful, so how you ask them should be taken seriously. Try the funnel approach with some sticky issue or challenge at work or at home. You’ll be amazed at the results.